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saadiamalik

PAKISTAN
Posted - Wednesday, November 05, 2003  -  10:15 PM Reply with quote
No, sister. You're certainly not diverting from the topic, and even if you were, we all must be happy and willing to address each other's concerns as fellow Muslims.

Wearing make-up in public, I think, is again an issue of personal preference and assessment. "How much is enough?" is a question subjective to circumstances.

If you were to ask me, I would suggest that it would be better to leave make-up for public places. Going to gatherings of trusted friends and families, etc. would be harmless places, but wearing make-up for places like shops, colleges, offices would better be avoided.

This is just a personal preference and I don't think anyone - in agreement or disagreement - can answer your question in strict terms.

Allah knows best.
daneste64

USA
Posted - Friday, November 14, 2003  -  12:31 AM Reply with quote
Assalamu aleikum!
I'd like to say, first of all, women are more attractive to me when are covered... It is just an opinion of one male, of course.
This is my question (or comment...): In the university where I study, many muslim women cover their head, in different styles (from a little to very much...). To me it is OK. What I don't understand is why some of them cover their heads while using really tidy jeans and tiny T-shirts... To me looks like a contradiction.
And needless to say... it provokes comments and a false image to non-believers.
I want to mention that I am not muslim already, I am just beginning this wonderful journey...
Thank you!
saadiamalik

PAKISTAN
Posted - Friday, November 14, 2003  -  12:44 AM Reply with quote
Assalaamu Alaikum Brother.

The attire that you have illustrated for us is certainly a contradiction in itself. One must remember, however, that for some girls, wearing the scarf has been the prescribed way for them since their childhood. They have to wear it.

If the subjects be interested, one should try and initiate a friendly dialogue with them, regarding the purposes of 'hijab' and what it teaches us, as a general rule.

Allah Hafiz.

Saadia

-----

I try to avoid looking forward or backward, and try to keep looking upward.

- Charlotte Bronte

The greatest glory in living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall.

- Nelson Mandela
hkhan

UNITED KINGDOM
Posted - Friday, November 14, 2003  -  3:42 AM Reply with quote
assalamo alaykum and may Allah b with u in this wonderful journey and may u reach the final goal safe amen

i think the course, the directives of hijab, coming up on this website will b v. informative in this regard insha'Allah

regards

.
Jhangeer Hanif

PAKISTAN
Posted - Friday, November 14, 2003  -  2:33 PM Reply with quote
I am saddened by the fact that the general perception of directives regarding male and female interaction is that these are meant to close down the ways to attract the opposite sex. I do not deny that this is the objective that is achieved when these directives are abided by. It follows while this is one objecive, it is not the overriding one. I mean if you keep in mind that you are trying to block the feelings of other people, you may not be able to achieve the supreme objective which is intended by the directives--the self purification. The simple reason I offer is that the person will be thinking more of 'attraction' as he/she is concentrating on how others including himself/herself should close down the ways of this attraction! Modesty and purity of heart seems more to me an outcome of concentrating on the inner self while adhering to the principles laid by the Holy Qur'an and dictated by common sense.

Every man and woman should bear in mind very clearly that the addressee of these directives is his/her own person primarily and not the other one. The spirit that would be created after this conscious decision would give them a poise in which attraction would work less in their surroundings.
saadiamalik

PAKISTAN
Posted - Friday, November 14, 2003  -  9:37 PM Reply with quote
Assalaamu Alaikum Brother Jhangeer, and everyone else.

In case your worthy comments are in specific reference to the issue of girls adorning tight jeans, the issue was not that these attracted the opposite sex; rather, that they are absolutely inappropriate clothings for any Muslimah, and especially contradictory for one who wears a scarf on top.

Allah Hafiz.

Saadia
Jhangeer Hanif

PAKISTAN
Posted - Monday, November 17, 2003  -  9:41 AM Reply with quote
I wanted to say a word about '...women are more attractive to me when are covered...' posted by daneste64 and of course, about my feeling based on the comments that I receive from people.

It is however to be noted that I did not try to criticize the opinion of daneste64. Rather, I just used his words to invite the Muslims to look inward more than what is in their surroundings.

To me, this makes a lot of difference. People appear to you in the view you have in your heart. Like the saying goes, 'beauty is in the eye of the beholder', 'modesty' is also in the eye of the beholder' and cannot be created by attire not matter how appropriate it may be. If WOMEN in your heart are 'Sisters' and 'Mothers', then they will appear to you in the same capacity. If you have this feature in your soul, then Julia Roberts or Nicole Kidman would be no more than respectable sisters to you and you would not be divested of purity even if you have to come across them. Does this make sense?
daneste64

USA
Posted - Monday, November 17, 2003  -  8:40 PM Reply with quote
Dear friends:
Thank you for the wise comments. It wasn't my intention to say anything wrong. Yes, to me there are a lot of thing to learn, and also to come across while I am just beginning my journey into Islam.
Respectfully,
Daniel
Jhangeer Hanif

PAKISTAN
Posted - Tuesday, November 18, 2003  -  9:26 AM Reply with quote
You need not worry. Everthing is fine. We need to discuss what comes to our mind. This place is right for that purpose. Don't you think that? You have my prayers!
hkhan

UNITED KINGDOM
Posted - Thursday, November 20, 2003  -  1:46 AM Reply with quote
assalamoalaykum

the following may help us in this conversation

regards


The Qur'anic Concept of Hijab

Shehzad Saleem

Islam has based its social structure on the institution of family. For the development of such a society in which the basic unit is the family, it is essential to regard chastity and modesty as fundamental values. It is to safeguard and protect these values that the Shari‘ah has laid down a whole code of social etiquette and communal conduct. These directives have been discussed in the Qur’an very minutely. Since, their interpretation, in recent times, has often touched the two extremes, it is, once again, necessary to contemplate on the Qur’an in quest for the ‘ariston metron’ --- the golden mean.
A deep deliberation on the Qur’an reveals that these directives, which have been dealt with in detail in Surah Ahzab and Surah Nur, are basically of three categories. Following is a brief analysis of these directives.



O
The first category of directives pertains to safe and secure places. According to the Qur’an, such secure places may either be residential ones (bayt-i-maskunah) like houses and apartments or non-residential ones (bayt-i-ghair maskunah) like offices and schools. It says that if some friends, relatives or acquaintances visit one another, they should follow a certain decorum. If the visited place is residential in nature, the visitor should first of all properly introduce himself by paying salutations to the residents of a house. In this regard, the Prophet (sws) has instructed the visitor to knock three times at the door and if he hears no reply, he should turn back and not start an incessant session of pounding the door. Furthermore, if the residents are not in a position to welcome him and they ask him to return, he should withdraw without any ill-will towards them. However, in case the visited place is non-residential, no formal permission is required. Once a person has entered his destination, the men and women who are present, should observe two regulations: they should guard their gazes from taking undue liberty and take care that the dress they are wearing properly covers them. Women should observe one additional regulation as well: they should not display their finery except those which is evident, that is their clothes or any adornments worn on the face and hands. For this purpose, the Qur’an says they should cover their chests by their head-coverings and should not strike their feet in a manner which draws attention to any ornaments they may be wearing. Furthermore, the Qur’an says that it is not necessary to observe this third regulation with mahram relatives, but as far as the first two regulations are concerned they must be observed without exception to anyone whosoever. It is evident, therefore, that men and women while observing these regulations can eat and converse together. The Qur’an says:

O ye who believe! Enter not the houses other than your own until you have introduced yourselves and wished peace to those in them. That is best for you that you may be heedful. If you find no one in the house, enter not until permission is given to you. If you are asked to go back, go back, for it is purer for you. Allah has knowledge of all which you do. It is no sin for you to enter non-residential places in which there is benefit for you. And Allah has knowledge of what you reveal and what you conceal.

[O Prophet!] tell believing men to restrain their eyes and guard their private parts. That is purer for them. And Allah is well aware of what you do. And tell the believing women to restrain their eyes and to guard their private parts and to display of their finery only that which is apparent by drawing their coverings over their bosoms. They should not reveal their finery to anyone save their husbands or their fathers or their husbands' fathers or their sons or their husbands' sons or their brothers or their brothers' sons or their sisters' sons or other women of acquaintance or their slaves or male servants lacking in physical needs or children who have no awareness of the hidden aspects of women. [In order not to reveal their finery except which is apparent], they should [also] not stamp their feet in order to draw attention to their hidden ornaments. Believers turn to Allah in repentance that you may prosper. (24:27-31)

O

The second category of directives pertains to places which are not secure and unprotected from people of lewd character. Markets, road sides, shops and parks are examples of places where such people might create nuisance for women. The Qur’an tells Muslim women to wear large cloaks when they go out so that a part of the cloaks covers their faces as well, for this is the way dignified women dress up when they go out. This dress will identify them as decent women and they will not be teased. The Qur’an says:

O Prophet! tell your wives and daughters and the wives of the believers to draw a part of their cloaks on their faces [when they go abroad]. That is more proper so that they may be recognised and are not harmed. Allah is Forgiving and Merciful. (33:59)


O
The third category of these directives relates to the leading women of a society, who set an example for others. Owing to the special position of the Prophet (sws), his wives occupied this place in his times. Consequently, these directives have been addressed to them. It is clear that the leading women of a society play a very essential role. The values which they adopt become the values of the society, and the trends they set become the trends of the society. If they falter, the whole society falters and if they remain on the right path, the whole society remains on the right path. It is due to the special position of such women that some additional directives have been given to prevent any scandal mongers from spreading mischief.
Firstly, womenfolk of such stature must refrain from openly exhibiting their embellishments. The Qur’an strictly forbids them to adorn themselves and go about displaying themselves. It says:

Wives of the Prophet! stay in your homes and do not display your adornments as women used to do in the days of ignorance. (33:33)

Secondly, they should take care that whenever, they have to say something to people in whose hearts there is the ailment of lewdness, they should speak without showing any softness to them:

O Wives of the Prophet! you are not like other women. If you fear Allah do not be too complaisant of speech lest one in whose heart is a disease should be moved with desire. (33:32)

In this regard, the people who assemble in the houses of the leading men of the society are also directed to observe certain manners.
Firstly, they should not become a source of trouble for the residents of the house by coming at the wrong time or unnecessarily prolonging their stay. In the words of the Qur’an:

O ye who believe! enter not the Prophet's dwellings unless permission be granted to you for a meal [and] not [so early as] to wait for its preparation. But if you are invited, enter and when you have eaten disperse. Linger not for conversation. Such behaviour distresses the Prophet and he shows his regard for you but of the truth Allah does not have regard for anything. (33:53)

Secondly, If these people want anything from within the house, they must not charge inside, but ask for what they want from outside:

If you ask his wives for anything, speak to them from behind the curtain. That is purer for their hearts and theirs. (33:53)


--------

These are the Qur’anic directives of Hijab. The social etiquette they depict is poised magnificently between the extremes human civilisations have often witnessed. Like all other directives of Islam their object is to purify the soul and to purge it from evil, which is essential if man has to become worthy of the eternal life Heaven --- the eternal life for which the Almighty actually created him.



Home
(adapted from www.monthly-renaissance.com)

.
suecornish

USA
Posted - Tuesday, June 15, 2004  -  6:31 AM Reply with quote
Assalam alakum. I know that these are old threads but may I relate my journey to hijab.
I reverted to Islam in 1992, professed in 1997. I got a job with the government in 2000. I was not covered. Then came 9/11. I had been thinking about covering since 1999 but a statement by a co-worker and what was happening to covered sisters here in the states cemented my decision. My co-worker said "Don't worry, we still like you." Playing dumb I asked what he meant and he said that 'they' know what I am like because I am not covered. I reminded him that I am the same with or without a headcovering. In October I told my supervisor that starting the 1st of the year I will be dressing Islamically and I wanted to give managerment time to get adjusted to the idea. Well, he huffed, puffed, said it was a bad idea, people would take it wrong, why now. 9/11 I said, I have to make a difference.

Well, through the years since I have been asked if I was a nun about a dozen times. But when people come to the reception window they ask for "that nice muslim lady". I have had nothing but good comments and praises and I have been able to show, at least my little corner of world, that not all muslims fly planes into buildings. I have also found out how being covered just feels right and I wonder why I waited so long.

That's it. Thanks for listening.
ibrahim

PAKISTAN
Posted - Monday, June 21, 2004  -  8:29 AM Reply with quote
w salam Sister

Its realy very nice toknow all this about You. I pray that May Allah be with You in your All problems.

This is proving ONCE AGAIN that it's the BEHAVIOUR & PERSONALITY that MATTERS the MOST not JUST Hijab, "Darhee" OR any other thing like these.
hkhan

UNITED KINGDOM
Posted - Monday, June 21, 2004  -  1:00 PM Reply with quote
assalamoalaykum

and u r so very right sr. regarding the fact which came to my mind a no. of times that wen i, or as a mater of fact any hijabi sister works so hard and honestly to please Allah/God, and hard and honest work is something which majority of human beings wud like, whether they approve it openly or not ,so as a matter of fact hijab wud announce itself that this hard working and honet person is a muslim lady.

so wenever we do something good, we wud rather give the credit to Islam (the way of all Prophets/God's Messengers/Good people from the beginning)and hijab/ beard for brs., is a good way of doing that

regards and dua's for ur sacrifices in His way


Edited by: hkhan on Monday, June 21, 2004 1:02 PM

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