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[quote]Confusion Assalamu Alaikum Brothers and Sisters. This topic has gotten me under great confusion. I am a male 23 years of age and have been living in usa all my life. So I grew up around western society and interactions between the opposite sex. The thing I don't get is. There are lines from the Quran / Hadith that forbid this? Or is it if someone believes in those lines they are known as a salafi as I have been told. I did have interaction as a kid growing up but then came time i started to block off contact with the opposite gender that was not a mehram to me completely. As it is written, lower your gaze and you can't even talk to your own cousin as I have read. But today's society is so based on interacting with the opposite it has gotten me confused. Some imams will say it is ok and allow it? Some will say no it is not allowed. Some will say it is ok to do certain things and some will say it is not ok? Some people will categorize you into different categories? Shafi, Hanafi, Salafi, Liberal, Moderate, Traditional. It can totally confuse someone. Where are those categories/groups written in our religion? I thought we are suppose to follow what is written in the Quran and Hadith but seems like nowadays we got so much stuff goin on we start categorizing Muslims and having different beliefs as to what is right and what is wrong? Where are all these categories coming from? They are not in the Quran, your either a nonbeliever or Hypocrite or a Muslim (believer) when it comes down to beleiving Islam, so where are these other categories originating from? When something is forbidden in the religion, such as gender interaction? Why is it even ok "NOWADAYS", when it really wasn't in the past. Why are we categorized nowadays in categories when categories like this didn't exist in the "PAST". Why are some people trying to add additions and rulings to Islam and allowing certain things when it is "FORBIDDEN" in Islam. Why is something "FORBIDDEN" stretched to be allowable today in Islam. Why are some people saying no one said Islam was an easy religion? when I have been told Islam is easy, not hard. I myself have talked to the opposite but I cut them off in fear I am doing something wrong? Some brothers will tell me I am being too overboard and try to bring down my faith as if I am doing something terribly wrong and say it's allowed, don't you hear some imams? I do hear some Imams say its ok but then again, I don't believe in an all Imams, I am trying to follow what is written in the Quran and Hadith not another man, because he is no prophet, the last Prophet was Prophet Muhammad (saw). Some Imams that give advice through their personal opinion or based on society is something I will not follow. As long as it is the advice that is based from the Quran and Hadith then it is believable. And I am seeing how some Imams might cause misguidance. This confusion inside me is just confusing me. I see Brother's/Sisters at conferences and other groups interacting and then "hooking" each other up and in most cases the hook up doesnt even work well or reach marriage? I see them getting to know each other so well that they chill and have starbucks afterwerds? And I ask them is it ok/allowed? I am then told that if your out in a public place where everyone can watch you and it's not behind closed doors, you can go out with the opposite freely. I thought no matter what a Mehram had to be there and that was only allowed in the purpose of marriage. When I asked a brother are we allowed to do this,he said how are we allowed to find our soul mate? Is this western concept of boy / girl relationship hitting our religion? Is it ok? I thought we couldn't and we had to restrict ourselves from the opposite sex to prevent certain things from happening? TO find someone is it necessary to do this? Or to do it in a Halal manner by having a Mehram present no matter what when it came to gender interaction. I have been around a lot of gender interaction when I was young, going to lectures, going to diners, but then I started to think to myself? Are people trying to change the values of Islam? Because I have to answer for what I have done one day? And now even some Imams are saying it might be ok while some are saying it isnt? I don't know what to do. It has gotten me kind of confused and I would like the right advice and what is written in the Quran / Hadith regarding all of this. Today things exist that didn't exist before, but that doesn't mean to modify the belief to set it to society and how it is today right? That would be a modification to belief. Because ISLAM is an unchanged unedited religion as I have been told. So why are some people adding things and changing it nowadays. Society how and why is it influencing it so much. Why are people saying it hasn't changed when really people all around are trying to add/edit it through their point of views and not what is written. It hurts me and causes me great confusion. If anyone can help me out here that would be great. Jazakhallah Assalamu Alaikum Edited by: sanank on Wednesday, July 20, 2005 1:36 AM[/quote]
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